Ownership

Good evening friends!

You all would be proud of me I think because I have done a lot of adulting this past week and weekend.  Student teaching continues to be a rollercoaster of ups and downs.  Some days go great like on Tuesday when my 1st and 2nd grade students had their winter concert.  They did such a great job.  They were incredibly patient and stood quietly on those risers for 30 minutes straight.  If you don't find this impressive, you should spend a couple of days in the presence of 6 and 7 year-olds.  Their songs also went well and most importantly, they looked like they were having fun.  Watch out world, my 1st and 2nd grade students are bringing some stellar singers your way!  The only hiccup was that one of the students did start throwing up during the concert.  My heart broke for her because she obviously wanted to be up there even though she didn't feel well.  Also, if you are wondering, no, it still wasn't snowing but it did snow a little bit later in the week!

Some days aren't so great, like when one of my fifth grade classes has that one student who just doesn't want to listen to a thing you say and it really just ruins the entire class for you.  The rest of the class was great, but it seems that I still continue to focus on what didn't go right, mostly because I really want him to enjoy the ukulele unit too!  My cooperating teacher ended up speaking to him and he was supposed to apologize to me.  He didn't but he did cooperate more that next class!  It also just so happened that my 4th grade students rocked on their recorders so that really cheered my day up as well.

Something I've noticed with teaching is that your students really suck you in.  I really do care so much about them and I want them all to find music as exciting and awesome as I do.  So when there are those students who are a little less motivated than the rest, it becomes a game of "How do I get that student to be motivated about ukulele/recorder/Nutcracker/rhythms?"  Of course, I suppose that's a good thing because then you are really doing your best to reach out to that student who, for whatever reason, needs a helping hand.  I just have to remember to give attention to my other students as well.  It's a very fine balance that I'm still figuring out.

Teaching definitely makes you into a very reflective person.  A good teacher is always looking inside themselves and at their teaching to see what went well and what can be improved.  A lot of times, especially in my experience, this also means admitting when you have made a mistake.  This past week I made a small teaching mistake that really confused one of my fifth graders.  It was a small change in the way some information was presented, a change I didn't even give a second thought to.  Something I've now learned about children, they are not fans of change, especially change in something they are still just learning.  Because I changed something so small, this one fifth grade student was so confused and frustrated that she was on the verge of giving up.  After encouraging her and coaching her through, she eventually figured it out.

An apology was definitely in order.  I apologized for confusing her, explaining that I had no idea such a change would confuse her so badly.  I let her know that I was still learning too and that she had taught me a very valuable lesson.  By the end of the hour, I think she had started to forgive me.

It's hard to admit you were wrong.  It's hard to take ownership of your own screw ups.  I see my elementary kids struggle with this concept everyday.  It is much easier to convince ourselves that the other person who is upset just doesn't understand and doesn't have grounds for being as upset as they are.  Guess what, it really doesn't matter.  If you are responsible for offending someone, confusing someone, or hurting someone, an apology is always a good place to start.  Adulting means taking responsibility for your actions, even if you are ashamed of those actions.  It's hard to own when you've done something wrong, but it is the responsible thing to do.

As a closing, I just want to say how excited I am to be going home to see my family, friends, and fiance this week!  I miss them very very much and it has been a long time since I've seen many of them.  If you celebrate Thanksgiving, enjoy all of the family company, turkey, mashed potatoes, and fun stories!  I'm sure I'll have some to share next week.  If you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, enjoy whatever days you get off as a result!  Be safe, and please, don't go shopping on the night of Thanksgiving.  Black Friday should stay in the confines of Friday and not spill over into the family time of others.  To h.h.gregg - I don't like you because you are making my aunt work on Thanksgiving so you can sell objects that in the grand scheme of things don't matter.  Thanks.

 See you guys next week!

- Jamie